The Rhythm of Healing

Life is a rhythmic event.

We do not blanket rhythm over our lives, it is the pulse of life. The earth turns on its axis and the sun rises and sets. The tides ebb and flow. The moon waxes and wanes. A bird's wings beat in flight. Seasons flow into one another in a predictable sequence.

Our breath flows in and out, our hearts beat, our cranial rhythm pulses. We are rocked in the womb and later in the arms of a caregiver.

If we look at these natural expressions of rhythm we find the same thing; rhythm has reliable elements that flow in a reliable sequence.

There is expansion and contraction and in the space in between there is grace.

There is day, there is night, and there is also dawn and dusk. Half of the year is ruled by the expansion of day and half of the year is ruled by the expansion of night. And in between are the equinoxes.

Our hearts beat in a 3 fold pattern.

We breathe in pause and breathe out.

Our days move in a rhythmic manner; we have times of concentrated focus and times of expanded relaxation and the times of moving between the two.

The more we align with the rhythmic flow the more we are connected to our inherent well being.

Just as the length of the day increases and decreases with the seasons, our healing can increase and decrease in response to need and energy. Pendulation is the cornerstone of this healing.

Pendulation is the natural rhythm of expansion and contraction in the nervous system. It is the inherent capacity to rhythmically shift between states of distress/contraction and pleasure/expansion.

A resilient nervous system is one that can move back and forth between states of alertness and action and calm and rest without getting stuck at either extreme. If traumatic stress is about being stuck, pendulation is about the rhythm of expansion and contraction to get unstuck. It is the rolling rhythm of the waves carrying us safely to the shore.

Pendulation is an essential to increasing the capacity to experience positive bodily feelings while remaining in contact with distress. To observe difficult, uncomfortable, physical sensations and images without becoming overwhelmed by them. Pendulation brings you into the present moment, the grace, where healing happens.

So how do we increase this capacity to be with distressful thoughts, emotions, and sensations? There is no quick fix. So we start small, bringing curiosity and empathy to ourselves.

The next time you find yourself feeling agitated by thoughts or ruminations you might try this practice.

6 Steps to Help You Be With What You Feel

1. Ground. Wiggle your feet, rock in your seat. Feel the support of the earth underneath you and the breath in your chest. Say, "I am here."

2. Notice. What sensations are you aware of? Notice where you are feeling something uncomfortable; things like pain, tightness, anxiety.

3. Acknowledge. Say "I am sensing something in me feels...." Notice how that changes your relationship to what you feel.

4. Orient. Look around you and notice what brings you delight. What colors catch your eye, what smells do you find pleasing, what textures are soothing. Spend a moment and take them in.

5. Notice. What sensations do you feel in your body when you spend time in delight?

6. Sway. With curiosity, sway back and forth between that in you which is uncomfortable and that in which you find delight. Allow your body to move if that feels right. Move with your breath if that feels right. Notice the grace, the stillpoint where the uncomfortable turns toward the delight and where it turns back.

When you are able to turn toward what you're feeling, especially when it is uncomfortable

You are walking the path toward presence and sustained healing.

We are rhythmic creatures in a rhythmic world. The question is how well the rhythms of our lives are actually supporting our deep needs and our ability to connect with the pulse of life.

There is no way we can come into harmony with ourselves or our world unless we honor and work in harmony with the principles of nature.

Tosca DeVito 3/5/23

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I offer one-on-one somatically-based guidance to help stressed out and anxious women calm their nervous systems, so they can get in touch with their deep body wisdom, trust their inner truth, and connect to all that they are.

Find out if you could benefit from my approach, schedule a consultation, or drop me a note and tell me what you need.